15th
What the abortion felt like
It started out much like any gynocological exam. Naked from the waist down, I pushed down to the edge of the table with my feet in the stirrups. My boyfriend sat in a chair next to me and held my hand the whole time. I think this was definitely the best part of it. I’m so happy that he was able to be there with me and think that all women going through this should have the opportunity to have their boyfriend, husband, or friend there with them and holding their hand. I think I would definitely trade a medical sedative for the chance to have my guy next to me.
The doctor inserted the speculum and then wiped my cervix clean with an antibiotic. She then topically numbed it a bit and followed that up with an anesthetic injection. This felt like a tiny little poke and was mostly just uncomfortable. No less odd feeling than a regular pap smear. The weird part was that I got a little woozy and dizzy seconds after the shot because the anesthetic entered my blood stream. She talked me through this, but I actually liked the feeling. Next she dilated my cervix but I didn’t really feel much more than a bit of pressure. She then inserted a hose about the diameter of a pen, and again I felt a bit of pressure. I could feel once the procedure started because I started getting some cramps, about the same as I would during a period. They continued as she continued the aspiration. There was also a slight tugging feeling from the inside that was kind of odd. I kept my hand on my belly the entire time and could feel my uterus tugging from the inside. Like my belly was actually rising and falling. The cramping continued but it was no worse than what I get with my period (except that I couldn’t roll over and curl into a little ball like I wanted. At the very end the cramping got really bad, which she said was normal because it meant the uterus was contracting back to it’s normal size. The good part about it is that once that bad pain starts you know it’s almost done. About 20 seconds later she pulls everything out and told me I could curl up a bit if I wanted.
I think the worst part was probably the five or so minutes afterwards when the cramping got intense and the nausea struck. I started sweating a bit and my boyfriend held my hand tightly and kept a bucket in his hand in case I needed to throw up. The cramps were uncomfortable…like a combination of period and bathroom cramps at the same time and for a second I felt like they would never go away and I would be curled up in that room forever, but they actually lessened quickly and soon all but disappeared. The doctor came back in and handed me a bottle of antibiotics that i need to take twice a day for the next three days, a NuvaRing that I can start this week (tomorrow if I want!) and a prescription for the next year. She then told me to relax and hang out as long as I want.
Boyfriend held my hand and kissed me and told me he loved me, which was wonderful to hear at that moment. He told me that I’m so brave and we promised that we won’t go through this again. Soon I felt better and I got dressed and walked out of the hospital just as calmly as I walked in. We took a cab home and he ran out to get me a box of Velveeta Mac n Cheese, which might sound gross, but is exactly what I’m craving right now.
